5 things every man should own

This isn't meant as a comprehensive list of things a man should own. These aren't essential items to life. These are things that will enrich your life, and make you a better human being. Five things in no particular order:

Tuxedo

This should go without saying, but every man should own the most manly of outfits: the tuxedo. Over the past few decades, the tuxedo has devolved into a sorry parody of itself (much like the tuxedo-toting Pierce Brosnan James Bond). It has gotten so bad that men everywhere dread wearing them, and most certainly don't own one. But in recent years, it has made a comeback.

The reason why you should own a tux are many. But let's begin with the reason why so many men hate wearing them: rental tuxedos are ugly, uncomfortable, and they make an otherwise fit gentleman look like Tweedle Dee.

What is a tuxedo?
Simply put, a tuxedo is a semi-formal suit made of black material. What distinguishes a tuxedo from a black suit are the lapels and pants. The lapels of a tuxedo are made of a shiny material such as grosgrain or satin. A matching material is also applied to the outer seam on the pants providing a shiny stripe on the leg. Things like waistcoats and cummerbunds are optional, and I don't recommend them.

What's wrong with rental tuxedos?
Rental suits are made to fit the maximum number of men possible. It seems like the measurements they take of you in the store are just for show - part of the experience. I remember getting my measurements back once which were far off from my real measurements. I'm a 38 chest, and they had 44 written down. Plainly put, they're too big. They hang from your shoulders with too much material, making it look like you're wearing a parachute. They provide no form, so that masculine figure is hidden beneath the lumps of material. Finally, they're made from polyester for ease of cleaning, which is the worst material for suiting. Polyester doesn't breath as well as other fabrics, meaning you're hot and sweaty.

Another reason to own instead of renting is for economic reasons. A custom-fitted tuxedo (with custom shirt) will run just under $500 from Indochino. In my young adult life, I have been in at least six wedding parties so far, and I have more single friends ready to get married. I've easily spend $175 on each rental. If I had invested in my own tuxedo from the get-go, I could have saved over $500 already, I would have looked better, and I would have been more comfortable.

How should my tuxedo fit?
A tuxedo jacket, just like a suit jacket, is designed to accentuate the male figure. Strong shoulders, tight waist and tall silhouette are all very masculine. The suit jacket has some padding in the shoulder to make the shoulders stronger. The V shape of the lapels make the waist thinner, and the torso taller. The dark suiting material make the whole figure look taller. All of these are lost in off-the-rack suits and rental tuxedos, built for one-size-fits-all. Without proper fit, you will look bad, and will cherish the time the suit comes off.

A proper fitting jacket will hug your shoulders without pulling the shoulder or lapels. A simple test is to put the jacket on and lean the shoulder against the wall. The shoulder seam should hit the wall with your shoulder. The shoulder should not hit first, and your shoulder should not hit first. They should both hit together. The jacket sleeve should reach your wrist bone with your arms at your side. The waist should button comfortably allowing your fist to barely fit between your belly button and the jacket button. The jacket tails should fit inside your cupped hands as they hang at your side. It should not bunch in your hand, and it should not be too short to not be inside your cupped fingers. Here is a great guide.

What color should my tuxedo be?
There are really only two colors a tuxedo should come in. White or black. White jackets should be paired with black pants. But this is for a "white tie" affair. The vast majority of people will never attend such an event. Stick with a black tuxedo. (A midnight blue tuxedo is an acceptable substitute for black as it is so deep the two colors are hardly distinguishable.) Do not stray from this. Any time you would wear a tuxedo, you should not be trying to stand out from the crowd. These are worn at formal events where someone is usually honored, and it's usually not you. Be respectful.

Because too many people don't pay attention, here's one more reason to stick with the rules: Men's tuxedos (and lounge suits) are dark for two reasons.

1. Dark colors are slimming (see above)
2. The man's colors are dark so as to not attract attention away from the woman they are escorting.

Be respectful.

The shirt of a tuxedo is always white. The tie color may change if you are part of a wedding party, but generally the tie is black (of the same material as the lapels). A white linen pocket square is usually the finishing touch. Always wear freshly-shined black leather shoes.

What material should my tuxedo me made from?
Wool. Not wool-polyester blend. Not wool-cotton blend. Not Poly-cotton blend. Not polyester. Just wool. The lining will be made from satin. Anything else will be poor quality.



Wristwatch

In the "digital age" we don't have as much need for a timekeeping device as we once did. I have at least five time-telling devices on my desk. But don't think of a wristwatch as just a timekeeping device, think of it as a time machine.

Being plugged into the internet 24 hours a day, the analog wristwatch connects the man with the past, with masculine heritage. A well-made wristwatch also connects the man with the future. The watch has long been the inheritable treasure from father to son, connecting generations through a timeless timekeeper.

What kind of watch should I own?
Not just any watch will do. This is an investment you will make once in your lifetime, to last past your own expiration date. While you don't necessarily have to spend tens of thousands of dollars on a Rolex Submariner, it's best to invest in a classically timeless timepiece.

The movement should be analog, not digital. Your watch shouldn't have a battery. It will keep time through a process called "manual" or "automatic." Manual movement requires periodic winding of a knob to keep it moving. Automatic movement will use the normal movement of the wrist to keep itself wound.

Make sure the watch is built of high-quality materials by a highly-regarded company with years of experience. There are plenty of wristwatch sources to research the ideal watch for yourself. I'll get you started with Watchonista.

Pen

There is something remarkable about signing your own name with a hefty pen. But why should you invest in an expensive pen when cheap ones work just fine? One reason is self-satisfaction. A good pen is a work of fine craftsmanship. Another is knowing you always have a trusty pen on hand at all times. While some may envy your pen, they won't be confused thinking they can take the pen with them when they're done. When you pull that pen out of your pocket, you will be sure to put it right back when you're done.

What kind of pen should I own?
There are five basic types of pens, but you should only concern yourself with two.

• Fountain pen. This pen is for the most daring individual. Used for centuries, the fountain pen uses a water-based liquid ink delivered from a reservoir through a thin slit of a pointed metal tip called a nib. This requires deliberate writing, and practiced penmanship as the pen is not pressed into the paper, but gently glides along top.
• Rollerball pen. Don't let the name fool you, this is not a ballpoint pen (nor does it have anything to do with the terrible movies). The rollerball pen is a happy medium between a ballpoint pen and the fountain pen, and is generally less expensive than the fountain pen. Using water-based ink, the writing seems into the paper instead of drying on the surface, making a more satisfying character.

Pens can be inexpensive, or reach into the thousands of dollars. Yes, there are pen enthusiast clubs, so if you want to find some professional help selecting a pen, start with them.

Black Leather Oxfords

Every man should own a pair of handcrafted black leather oxfords. If you don't own another pair of dress shoes at all, you definitely should have these. They can be worn with casual clothes, business attire, or formal wear. Well-built ones will last you most of your life with proper care.

A good pair of shoes made from a quality company will be made from leather. The sole will be leather stitched to the leather upper. The heel will be made of wood with rubber.

These shoes will be cared for by placing cedar shoe trees inside them after taking them off. This will absorb moisture, keep the shape of the shoe, and fight odor. At least once per month, the shoe will be cleaned and polished. To learn how to shine, see this article.

Things to consider:

• Avoid trends. You want a shoe that will last a lifetime without telling the world you're stuck in the past. Timeless shoes for timeless gentlemen.
• Round toe is the way to go. Square toes are out of fashion now, but they were really only in fashion for a few years for the first time since Blackbeard terrorized the Eastern Seaboard. They were trendy then, and if they come back they will be trendy again. Round toes are not trendy, they will always be stylish.
• Cap toes are less formal than plain toes. But with a good pair of shoes (like those pictured above) will look just as good in formal situations.

You really can't go wrong with a shoe like this. It will always look good with any outfit.

Shaving Kit

Every man should already have some sort of shaving gear, but you don't want to be everyman, you want to be exceptional. You want to own a proper shaving kit.

What is included in a shaving kit?

• Razor You might not be ready to go with a straight razor, so stick with what you're comfortable with. Ditch the cheap razor, though, and get a nice steel or aluminum one. They are made to fit Mach 3 or Mach 4 blades, but they look better and will last longer. Or you can go old school and get a safety razor, which uses individual double-edged razor blades. Both razors have their benefits and weaknesses. The new technology razors have the benefit of being faster to use, and less risk of cutting your face. The safety razor has the benefit of being less expensive in the long run. After the initial investment in the razor, the blades are less than $0.50 each (compared with $2.50 each for Mach 4 blades). Professional barbers also recommend them for gentlemen who develop rashes with regular blades. As the safety razor only has one blade, there is less friction than multi-blade razors. The drawbacks of the safety razor are twofold: It's easier to cut yourself with these blades, and it takes longer to shave.
• Brush A badger-hair brush has long been the go-to for men. The brush develops soap or cream into a lather, and the bristles help scrub dead skin off the follicles, and lift the hair off the face for a closer shave. Yes, spraying gel from a can is faster, but it's hard to beat a brush and soap.
• Bowl Shaving soap can develop a very frothy lather, so you'll want a bowl. Shaving bowls or mugs store the soap and provide a place to whip up a lather. It's essential when using a brush.

With these items, the gentleman will have a more enriched, fulfilling life. I'm not the materialistic type of person. I don't think a man has to own everything, or anything to be happy. I take pleasure in little things. In experiencing a fine wine, or a juicy steak. These five things are not just stuff to have, they're experiential. Using them is indulging in the finer things of life. They might cost a few pennies to obtain, but they're each an investment that will last a lifetime.

Cook your own dinner

The 21st Century lifestyle is so fast-paced, we hardly make time to even take care of ourselves. One area we should make sure to look after is our health. Home cooked meals are healthier than most restaurant fair, and the art of cooking is itself a pleasurable experience.

Why should I eat at home?

Budget
If you are on a budget, there is no easier way to save money than by preparing your own food. A lunch out at a fast food restaurant can run about $8.00, on average. A dinner at a national chain-restaurant can easily cost about $22.00 each. The budget for home cooked meals can be met just with a lunch and dinner out.

Learning a skill
Learning a new skill and applying it is one of the most satisfying feeling a person has. Learning a new cooking technique is exciting, and fulfilling. There are dozens of easy to understand books to learn cooking. Community centers often have cooking classes. The internet is full of cooking instructional and videos. And with TV networks like Food Network and HGTV, we have more information on the art of cooking than ever before.



Health
California law requires restaurants provide nutritional information to patrons for all menu items. This has greatly increased my awareness of what goes into my body when I eat out. Even the more "healthy" dishes at the average restaurant is loaded with sodium (salt, sweeteners, MSG, preservatives). Just as one example, I'll randomly pick what one might consider a healthy meal from a T.G.I. Friday's menu. The Mediterranean Chicken Salad sounds healthy enough. Everyone knows Mediterranean food is healthy, and salads are a good alternative for the health-conscious. It does only have 425 calories, and only 12 grams of fat. But look at the sodium: 916 milligrams. That's nearly 40% of the daily recommended allowance for sodium (for a 2,000 calorie diet), just in one salad.

For the purposes of this article, I won't even talk about how much fats and calories are in restaurant foods - we all know it's astronomical. So let's review what high sodium can do to your health: High sodium diets can cause high blood pressure (hypertension), which substantially increases the risk of developing heart disease or stroke. Too much sodium has also been linked to an increased risk of stomach cancer.

Home made foods generally contain far less sodium. Why? Chain restaurants often have large prep-kitchens in distribution centers that prepare food portions, and then ship them to the restaurants for the final cooking. Because of this, they're loaded with preservatives to maintain color, moisture, and flavor. Additionally, restaurants load foods with sweeteners, MSG and salt because these enhance the flavor palette of the tongue, making everything else taste better. They want you addicted to their food so you'll come back. At home, you don't have to deal with shipment and storage times, and when you are adding salt to your dish, you're acutely aware of the amount you're using. You will only use enough to flavor the dish, not overwhelm your taste buds.

Plus, you never know what goes into some of this food.



Relaxation
I enjoy restaurants, and sometimes there is nothing more relaxing than blowing off domestic obligations for a nice night out. But oftentimes, we use the convenience of to-go foods to stuff more things into our daily schedule. Forcing yourself to take the time to be creative in the kitchen allows you to focus on something other than the trials of the day, and makes you slow down for about an hour.

A stronger family
If you're a parent, nothing can create a strong family relationship as easily as a family dinner. Pick a time, and be consistent. Even if nobody feels like being together, just do it. Time spent together creates strong bonds. Plus, studies have shown that a family dinner is a very reliable indicator of a child having good grades in school, and a more successful career.

Fun fact: The art of gift giving

Giving a gift can be a trying experience. We all want to give a gift that is memorable, but also something that the recipient will appreciate long after the giving.

Every year, my family passes around wish lists. These are great, but they're also boring.

A good gift tells the recipient that you know who they are. You understand them. A great gift is something they never thought they would want, but that they love.

Gift giving should have adventure. Be risky, and go for something unexpected.

Ride your bike to work

 Photo by Spencer Platt/Getty Images North America

With such busy lives, we hardly have time to get the exercise we so desperately need. This is a problem of priorities for most of us, of course, as we could work out instead of watching Modern Family, but we don't. We just complain to our friends that we really need to get into shape, but we just don't have time.

It might sound cliché, but how about you kill two birds with one stone and bike commute?

Why should I bike commute?

I think we're all aware that exercise is good for our bodies. Bicycle riding is one of the best cardiovascular exercises you can do. But I bet you didn't know it was also makes us happier.

Recently, psychologists at Harvard conducted a test where they contacted people at random using an iPhone app called Track Your Happiness to determine how people felt while conducting different tasks. The second most satisfying task people reported doing was exercise. Near the bottom of that list was commuting and working. Imagine if you could combine one of the happiest activities with one of the least?

It's true that turning something enjoyable into a chore can sometimes be exacerbating, but the cardiovascular pleasure of riding a bike, and the self esteem you will build, would certainly make the commute more pleasurable than sitting in traffic.

Regular exercise releases serotonin from the brain. Serotonin is a natural chemical in your brain that creates a sense of happiness and well-being. Sunlight also increases your levels of serotonin Low levels of serotonin causes irritability, depression, and anxiety. Riding your bike will literally change your mind.

How to commute by bike

Before you begin commuting by bicycle, you will need a few things.

• Bicycle A lot of us already have bicycles, but they're just sitting in the garage or on the patio. If that's you, just take it to the local bike shop and get it tuned up for safety and speed. If you don't have a bike, get one. I'll explain some details below.
• Helmet Be safe. A lot of drivers don't look for bicyclists. Follow the rules of the road, and wear a helmet.
• Plan You can't just hop on the bike and head to work, in most towns. Get on a map and plan a route. Google Maps can provide directions by bike. Spend a weekend riding the proposed routes to get to know it so you don't run into a surprise.
• Bags You will be carrying items with you. Most bike commuters find a small backpack is sufficient enough, but others prefer panniers (bike-mounted bags). This is a personal decision, so you'll want to check out the options.
• Supplies It is impossible to foresee all events. Be prepared with a spare tube, pump, patch kit and tools. Bike shops have small kits you can throw in a bag. But since you're headed to work, you'll also want to bring a few more items, or store them in your desk. Deodorant, a towel, hair comb/brush, and a change of clothes.

What kind of bike should I buy?

As with most things, a bicycle is a very personal decision. Everyone has different priorities on comfort, aesthetic, price, etc. But there are a few basic tips to help you understand what to look for in a commuter bike.

Size and fit
For the most comfortable ride, a proper-sized bicycle is imperative. You want your legs to fully extend on the down-stroke without going completely straight, where your knee can lock. The length of the bike will determine how horizontal your body will lie. The flatter you go, the faster you go - and the less comfortable. The more vertical you go, the more comfortable the ride, but you also provide less power to the pedals, and more air resistance.

I suggest reading this article on fit and watch this video.



Purpose built
There are several types of bikes built for specific styles of riding. I'll just focus on the main four types here.

• Cruiser The cruiser style bike has a very vertical seating position, wide tires with little tread, wide handlebars, and usually just a single gear. This type of bike is very comfortable to ride, but is intended for slow speeds. The wide tire and upright position are not conducive to fast road speeds.
• Mountain The mountain bike has become so prevalent that many people own them without ever riding them on off-road terrain. They have a strong frame, flat handlebar, multiple gears, slight forward posture, and wide, knobby tires. Many mountain bikes also have suspension in the fork. Everything about a mountain bike is for rough, tough riding. If you're riding on streets and sidewalks, you don't need a mountain bike. Everything about them will slow you down and wear you out. The suspension provides some comfort, but also requires more energy from you to accelerate. The wide, knobby tires provide a lot of resistance, and slow you down.
• Road The road bike is built for speed. There are variations on the road bike, but it generally has a lot of gears, horizontal posture, light frame, dropped handlebars, and skinny tires. These bikes are adequate for bike commuting as they take little effort to get up to speed.
• City These bikes go by a lot of different names: Commuter, Urban, Hybrid, Street, etc. These bikes are built for street riding at moderate speed. They're a little sturdier than racing road bikes, have a posture more like a mountain bike, a variety of gear options, and sometimes they have suspension. These types of bikes are ideal for commuting. They have skinny tires, but they're a bit wider than road bikes and with a slight grip. They're light, but they are strong and offer add-on features.

The most important issue when picking a bike is comfort. You won't be happy riding a bike you're not comfortable with.

Add-on features
These are a few features you'll want to add on to your bike for safety and convenience:

• Lights This will save your life. At night, it's dangerous to be riding a bicycle on the street without lights. You will need a taillight, and a headlight. You may also want to add reflectors or reflective tapes to add more visibility. Getting reflective clothing to wear while riding is also a very thoughtful safety feature.
• Pannier A pannier is a rack added to the front or back of the bike to allow adding bags. This will help you carry more without putting stress on your shoulders with a heavy backpack.
• Fenders Fenders attach to your bike to protect you from water, dirt, mud, oil or other debris on the roadway. The tires pickup this material and spray it onto your body. Since you're going to work, fenders will help keep you clean.
• Pedals Clipless pedals with bicyclist cleats will provide more power in your pedaling. These are only recommended for the serious cyclist who wants to get the most speed.

I used to drive my car thirty-five minutes from home to work. Now I ride my bike twenty minutes to work. I am not using any more time than I used to, but now I'm getting a daily exercise in the process - at least forty minutes every day.

I'm not saying I am riding my bike faster than I used to drive. I moved closer to work. If your commute is twenty miles from home, a bike commute may be more difficult. I have friends who bike commute that far or more, but it may not be for everyone. But with public transportation, you can easily ride a bus, subway or train closer to work and finish it off by bike.

If you do live under ten miles from the office, the commute by bike isn't substantially longer than by car. You might have to wake up earlier to make it happen, but you do want to be more disciplined, right? You do want exercise, so you'll need to prioritize it.

For more tips on bike commuting, check out this website.

5 things to do when being pulled over

From time to time there happens to be a Police car following us as we go about our day to day activities. Panic starts to set in, and we all begin going through a mental checklist: Was I speeding? Did I stop for the red light? Am I tailgating? Did I use my blinker?

Sometimes we're lucky enough to have the Officer stop "following" us because he turns in to where dispatch had sent him. And other times our stress level goes through the roof when those red and blue lights come on. If you're more so this unlucky type here are 5 things you can do...

1. This first step is taken before your nerve wracking contact with Law Enforcement: Make sure you have up-to-date paperwork in your vehicle (insurance and registration). And throw away all your old cards. There is no point in keeping insurance cards from 2005 A.D.; Antiques Roadshow won't be coming to your house to buy them.
2. Pull to the RIGHT! Not the left, and definitely don't stop right in the middle of the road or an intersection... To the right! After all that is what we learned in Drivers ED. 
3. After pulling over to the right, stop quickly. The Officer has numerous "traffic contacts" under his belt, and has selected that location and feels safe stopping you there. Don't continue on to where you want to go or think that you're making it safer for the Officer. Continuing to drive after the Officer turns on his emergency lights causes the Officer to think you have ulterior motives, and makes him wonder if you're going to stop at all. In Texas they're bound to run you off the road if you don't stop right away.
4. Wait until the Officer is at your door to start reaching for your paperwork, and until then keep your hands clearly visible, on the steering wheel is a great place. If you've completed step 1, then finding your paperwork shouldn't be a glovebox scavenger hunt. If you're being contacted at night: turn on your cabin lights and keep your hands on your wheel until contacted. Aside from Domestic Violence calls, traffic stops are the most dangerous thing that Officers do daily. Make them feel comfortable contacting you.
5. Don't "cop" an attitude, or come up with some harebrained excuse. While being polite might not always get you out of a ticket, it definitely can sway that in your favor. Plus being polite is something we should be anytime. If you do get a ticket, and you disagree with it; that's why there is a court date. Getting in a roadside argument isn't going to change anything, except maybe the Officer will circle "POOR" for your attitude on the back of the ticket. 

These 5 things should help you get through a traffic stop with your sanity, and in a timely manner.